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YOU MIGHT JUST GIVE THEM A SAFE PLACE TO GROW UP

What a thing to hear, to process, to fully understand. I thought the statement was a crazy thing to say to a mom!!! That was just what Joe Haas said to me many years ago. Maybe it was the harsh reality of children with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. Now that is better known as FASD. Who really knows??

Fast forward many, many years now. Maybe that statement is more true than ever. Merrill and I now have many adult children that have made a somewhat successful transition to living on their own. Please do not read it has not been without more than a few bumps in the road, for there have been many. During their transitions, our pain has been nearly unbearable at times.

We have often wondered why did things have to be this way. What did we do wrong? What could we have done differently? Why does there have to be so much pain??

We have come to figure out that it is all part of the journey. That sounds funny, doesn't it? As child, most of our children were very impulsive, guess what, as adults they…
Recent posts

THIRTY YEARS HAVE COME AND GONE

And I still miss her.

I was 28 years old. Merrill and I had just celebrated our 8th anniversary. My mama had sent me a beautiful card and wrote in it that we could celebrate once we were back together....Merrill was away with the military. 

We had one child and my mama was looking into how to help us get pregnant. 

She was strong. She was independent. She was a business woman. She loved the underdog. She loved a challenge. She had a fantastic mind. She made more than her fair share of mistakes. She owned up to them. She was complex. She was passionate. She loved my dad. She hated my dad. She and my dad were nearly an unstoppable team. She had lost a child.

She was 58. She was happy. She was at peace. She was honest to the core. She was a believer. She loved her Lord and Savior.

 She knew July 10th would be a special day. Did she know that was the day she would meet her Savior face to face?? I will never know the answer.

She helped to mold me into the person I am today.

I am strong. I am inde…

JERICHO'S LIFE MATTERS

These three little words that I posted on Facebook evoked a lot of emotions. Jericho's life matters. Why did I post those words?? Reality, Jericho had emergency surgery on July 8th. As I am writing this, he is still in PICU on a vent with no end in near sight. He is one sick boy, not a little boy, but soon to be an 18 year old man. I felt that the ones who should care about Jericho, did not. I felt that the ones that should be visiting Jericho were not. Bottom line, I spoke out as a mom in pain, hurting and tired. But you know what, God is in control. A wonderful person reminded me not to let negative thoughts enter my mind. She was and is right, but still, Jericho's life matters.

Jericho has Cornelia de Lange. He also has PICA. PICA is what put him here. It is the uncontrolled need to eat things that are non food items. We spend each and every day pulling things out of Jericho's mouth. Even the younger kids know to holler when they see Jericho trying to eat something. It i…

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY...37 YEARS TO BE EXACT

June 30, 2015  It has taken 37 years to arrive at this special day. I find it amazing that we have been married this long. I can't imagine being with anyone else but Merrill.

Merrill has a new to him trike. It is not the right time to post a picture of it as he has a few people he wants to show it to first. He is so excited about it. Anyway, he took the day off and planned a ride for just the two of us to go to Sacramento to eat at Joe's Crab Shack. It is one of our favorite places to eat. 





We left the house so excited. It was our day, just the two of us. As we were leaving town, we stopped at Walmart.....we always stop at Walmart. It is just what we do....LOL. We loved the ride up to Lake Tahoe. There are parts of it that just take your breath away. We really enjoy those places. As we were enjoying the ride, I felt a strange heating sensation on my leg,,,,,well it actually felt as if my leg was going to flat out burn up. We had to make a stop to figure this all out.


We stoppe…

AS MY MOTHER, SHE WAS LIKE NO OTHER!!! SHE IS MY MAMA.

My Mama passed away so many years ago, in 1986 to be exact. I have been missing her a lot lately. As I have gotten older, I understand the life she lived more than ever. I have a deeper understanding of what she really went through and who she really was. To be totally honest, she was just beyond amazing.

You see, all my life I have been told that I am just like my daddy, but I know I am not. I am just like my mama, misunderstood on so many levels. My mama had a strong sense of right and wrong. She always believed in the underdog and would help others without question. She was very intelligent and way ahead of her time. She was successful in the work force in a day and age when women were still at home.

When people hurt, she hurt. She was tough as nails and yet tender at the same time. She stood up for what she believed even when people did not agree with her. She was proud and I do not think that is wrong. She had an unstoppable work ethic and cared about the people that worked for he…

EMOTIONAL ROLLER COASTER

The past few weeks have been one heck of an emotional roller coaster ride. Joey has been in residential treatment since August. It has been so hard on him as it is his third go around. Mental health issues in children are just devastating for all involved. My heart breaks for him more than most will ever know.

Well, as part of his plan, he was to go into a step down type of program this time. This is to help to insure his chance at being successful coming home. We had waited, we had planned, we had it all worked out. Then there was no bed. So his "team" decided he was just going to once again discharge to home. Really!!! So what in their wildest dreams made them think he was going to find success this go around? How was it to be any different than the other two times?? Why were they playing with a child's life??

Thank goodness for people who have traveled this road before us. Thank goodness for the parents who refuse against all who have an opinion, to give up and give in.…

CAN LIFE GET ANY CRAZIER????

This life of ours....it is just nuts at times....I mean nuts by our normal standards. To be honest, that is crazy.

We have been trying to find out a better way to help the children. We have done counseling for so many and to be honest, it does not work. We mostly deal with major behavior issues and that is not something that seems to work itself out while in a counselors office.

So after many years of knowing that something out there had to be better, we managed to find a great team approach. Now a therapist comes into our home for about 8 to 10 hours a week. She works with the kids and Merrill and I in our real and natural environment. There is no hiding what is going on. She sees the good, the bad and the downright ugly.

She has worked with Merrill and I to learn how to take care of ourselves so we can be there for the children. We now have a date night about 3 times a month. With her encouragement, I have taken on CURVES...one baby step at a time there. She is a real blessing to all o…